Thursday, May 31, 2012

The Irony of My Life

I am still at the no new news point of my day.  I have been in contact off and on with my surgeons office, my surgeon, and my insurance company.  Tomorrow I am going to get my letter of surgical support from my primary.  I feel like I am back at day one of Lap Band surgery.  I also have to have another psych eval.... what if I don't pass?!  Are they going to refuse to take out my band... so stupid. 

Anyway, I am stuck in a place of no one being able to give me the answers I need.  I am not sure if my insurance is actually going to cover the Sleeve (though I have a friend who just had a sleeve revision after her band slipped at a different hospital with the same insurance as me) or if I will have to get rebanded/nobanded.  I would like to go on record and say, "my Lap Band has not been kind to me."  Sure we had one good year... but is has pretty much been downhill from there.  I am tired of this evil little monster making me miserable. 

Here is the ironic part.  My surgeon's office mentioned (without mentioning) that I might want to gain a few pounds to bring my BMI up.  I can only have liquids.  I had a milkshake and some cheesecake (not a liquid but somewhat doable) for breakfast... got on the scale... and down 3 pounds from the last time I weighed myself.  This is the first time anyone has ever given me permission to gain weight... but I can't eat solids.. and I am actually losing weight.  Is this the universe laughing at me?!  I think so.

I am not sad or angry or even really disapointed that my band slipped.  It just wasn't in the cards for me this time.  I just would like to eat a salad. 

All you super stars keep on keepin on!

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