Monday, September 27, 2010


I am so jealous of the BOOBS! I wish I could have been there... it looked amazing! Secondly, I will not be missing next year even if I have to sell my precious jewels (o wait I don't have any). I am back from my conference but am leaving on Wednesday for another speaking engagement. I won't be back until the following Sunday.

On the band front... things are good. I have great restriction, am hardly ever hungry, and can get full on 1/2 cup. That is a first for me, and I sort of love it.

Happy Monday!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Wishing you all a great BOOBS!

Hope you all have any amazing time at BOOBS! I will be thinking of you all this weekend. I am happy to say I lost 4.5 lbs this weekend bringing me to a new low! I am also officially out of the obese category and into overweight. That feels wonderful!

My new fill is fantastic, and is keeping me right on track! I have also started working out again which is making a big difference.

Have a great weekend!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Wish I was going to BOOBS

But I am not.... sadly, I will be speaking at a conference about 7 hours away. I hope you all have a good time, but seriously... reading all your blogs is making me want to stick a fork in your eyes! :) Yeah, I am jealous!

Monday, September 20, 2010

Update update

It seems that my fill is doing good things for me. I am much tighter in the morning then I am in the evening and need to eat semi soft foods for lunch. That is okay with me, I don't like to really push things at lunch (at work) and it is just easier to eat softish. I have also been much more active the past few days. I had a great weekend and took a couple long bike rides as well as walks. I am hoping that by Friday I will be down a couple more pounds.

Myself (lower left) and my husband (lower right) and our best couple hanging out at a bar on Friday. Obviously, I just can't kick that drinking. I also had some fried pickles.

Happy Monday!

Friday, September 17, 2010

Back on my way down

I got my fill yesterday and am SO glad! My doctor is great, he isn't afraid of a big ole fill now and then (even though I am). He gave me a .8 cc fill which scared the crap out of me at the time. I am at roughly somewhere between 7- 7.5 ccs now in my 10-11 cc band. My doctor is never quite sure how much is in my band but I have been trying to keep track myself.

Anyway, he was asking me about how much I could eat, what I was eating, ect. He decided a little less then 1 cc was what I needed. So he fills me... I take a sip of the water and it sits there and slowly gurgles down. This always makes me nervous. I asked him 10 times if this was okay.. he said it was great. I left and was on liquids all day yesterday.

I had yogurt this morning for breakfast and had to take it very slow, but no real problems. I am feeling good, and am excited about having better restriction. I am also on the losing side of things again getting myself back down to my pre-vacation low. I am hoping this fill is going to get me there faster.

On the not so good news side... my cholesterol was high. It was 259, something I have never seen before. I honestly think this isn't right, or it was a result of all the ice cream I ate this summer. I talked to the doctor about it and he said we will just recheck it in 3 months. I promise you this, it was be much lower in 3 months... there is no way I am losing 80 lbs and gaining a cholesterol problem!

Anyway, I am so looking forward to the weekend. I have hardly seen my husband this week (we have both been soo busy) and I want to spend some time with him.

Happy Friday!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Do you drink milk?

I was just reading this article about how milk drinkers may have a healthy weight advantage... I started thinking..a lot of people I know who drink milk with meals are thinner. I grew up in a rural part of Upper Michigan, where milk was just part of the meal time ritual. However, so were meat and potato meals with bread and real butter. The funny thing is... I didn't have a REAL weight problem until I moved out.

Just food for thought!

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

I weighed myself yesterday... and it wasn't good

I have gained 5 lbs. Yes, 5 whole entire pounds. Too much drinking and ice cream and general no good behavior. Now, I will repent. My sugar free cleanse seems to be going okay. I am not going to lie and say I enjoy it... I don't... but it also isn't as bad I as I thought it would be. I also feel good because I am making good choices again and going in the right direction.

I essentially went back to my doctors pre pre-op diet. It is very bland foods like oatmeal, cream of wheat, plain sugar free yogurt, skim milk, and veggies. There are a few other things in there but this is what I am eating. It is designed to bring you sugar levels back to normal and your salt level back under control. I suspect I should see some weight loss after a few days on this. I am not planning on weighing myself until Friday so I can see some actual results (hopefully).

Thursday I am going to get a fill, which I have mentioned, I need desperately. I can eat a whole lot these days with little trouble. It is funny how your restriction slowly starts to go and you just slowly eat more and one day you realize you need a fill fast.

Anyway, back on the journey!

Hope you are all well!

Monday, September 13, 2010


I am a big ole pile of grumble biscuits today. I am hating this Monday more then most. Maybe it is because I started my week of "sugar cleansing". I have been getting way carried away with inappropriate foods lately. I have put myself on a strict cleansing eating plan... blech!

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Thursday update

So, I am not sure what my deal is lately... first of all... I can eat way too much. So, I need a fill, that a certainly true. But secondly, I am just feeling so lazy about the whole weight loss thing lately. It is like I went on vacation and have never come back. I am not eating horribly, but I am also not making the best decisions. I am not really seeing any scale movement and I am not surprised.

I find myself thinking things like, "I don't really mind the weight I am at, why keep trying?" or "I will have to buy all new clothes once I lose more weight". Both of these things are true, but not a good reason to stop losing. I want to be healthy, I want to get into a normal weight category... I want to make good choices.

So I am wondering what my "real" issue is. I wonder if I am scared to lose more weight. I wonder if I have been comfortable at this weight and now am hesitant to push forward because I don't know if I will be comfortable at other weights. I am trying to look inside my mind and figure out what my real hold-up is. I am seeing now that the mental challenges are really coming to the surface. For the first year I was motivated, I was excited, this was all new. Now that real life has set in and the band has become old news I am faced with different feelings.

Maybe it is time to go back to that therapist!

Happy Thursday all!

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

One year + some days

So, I have been insanely busy and entirely missed my one year bandiversary last Thursday. I was busy updating my resume and applying for a new job. Things at my current place of employment are going down hill financially. As a library, we are funded by property tax. Property tax is falling in MI (and else where) which means WAY less money for us. The management and library board have almost agree (will vote this month) on a balanced budget for 2011, however, 2012 looks really bad. It looks like we will be laying people off... cutting hours.. furlough, or other things that will impact my income. I can't afford to work part time or not at all and some job opportunities have been opening up elsewhere... so I had to get my stuff together.

I would be sad to leave my current position and location but I would also like a new kind of challenge. We will see where this all goes... but anyway, things are a-okay for now.

On to my one year... I have pretty much stayed at 80 lbs down. I feel like this is something to celebrate! I would have liked to be 100 down... but honestly.. I am just going to keep on working on it and I know I can get there.

So much has changed in the past year... I feel so much better both physically and mentally.

I can do things I couldn't (or didn't want to) like hiking and biking and just walking around a festival. I am not out of breath or breathing hard. I sleep well, I don't snore, and I wake up refreshed. I feel like a somewhat normal person. I enjoy life much more. I make good eating choices MOST of the time. I enjoy clothes and shopping more.

However, I still have some work ahead of me. In the next year, I need to lose another 40ish lbs. I need to continue learning to use my tool for good and not evil... and I need to continue down a path of positive lifestyle... all still challenging, though less so.

I could not have made it this far without all my blog friends. Thank you for everything!