Tuesday, November 11, 2014

The Sleeve is a Strange Animal

So... I lost my motivation, and then I found it again, and then I lost it for a couple of days and then I found it again.  I am trying to string together enough days of motivation to start making a difference.  My anxiety has been through the roof lately, and I just don't handle eating well when I am in a place of panic.  It becomes the least important thing to me even though I know eating well improves my anxiety. 

I have had chronic anxiety my whole life... and I am on meds which help a lot.  Lately I am wondering if I need my dose upped.  Anyway, I am not looking for sympathy or excuses.  I just want to keep it real.

On to my sleeve story.  In January I will be two years out from my sleeve surgery.  I had a band for nearly 3 years before that and felt like I had a pretty good handle on the basics of eating post weight loss surgery.  Today, I was eating dinner at work (I work until 9) and I was eating some plain baked chicken (forgot the bbq sauce) and brown rice and some carrots.  I was eating at a fairly good clip because I had lots of stuff to get done.  I do this often and it is never a problem.  Well after I finished eating I was sitting at my desk working on stuff and I started to feel really nauseous..  Then I started having stomach pain.  I can't tell you how long it has been since I have been "stuck".  For God sake, I can easily eat 2 pieces of pizza while driving if I want to with no issues.  After about a half an hour it was getting worse and I knew I was going to puke.  I bet it has been a year since I have puked from a sleeve related reason.

After I thought about it, all the food I ate was really dry.  Also rice could potentially be a problem sometimes but hasn't been for months.  I got cocky, and I pushed my stomach... and I paid.  My misdeeds have been noted.  Hopefully I won't do the whole puking thing for a long time.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

The struggle is real

Here I am, back again after a way too long hiatus.  I am now a year older and zero pounds lighter.  I was just too busy celebrating my pre-birthday, birthday, and post-birthday.

I did however, dress up as a squirrel for Halloween.  It was fantastic.