I am a therapy hopper. I never stay, but I always go back... to someone new. This time I am seeing a therapist who deals only with eating disorders and eating related issues. (ME) I decided to go back because the longer I am on this weight loss journey, the more challenging I am finding things. Not just the weight loss part... but the "who am I?" part. I am not having relationship issues, or having problems accepting the change... I just don't know what I want.
I don't see myself at my current weight... I see myself as fat. I don't know what I want to weigh because I think I will always want to lose more. Don't get me wrong, I feel so much better.... but I still don't know who this new body is.
I also have some other issues.... I still can't figure out what to do with that hole that eating has left. I still want to turn to eating for comfort... but I really can't anymore.. it just isn't possible. I have a lot of questions for myself that I just don't know how to ask... so I turn to the therapist. Here we go again!