Friday, February 26, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
I ran to the staff bathroom and thank God no one else was in there. I got down on all fours and spit and spit and thought I would bring it up. I started to see stars! I am not sure what that was about but I thought I was going to die. Oww the pain... and then it went down. So then I threw away my chicken. I was so hungry I ate a couple handful of nuts... though nuts never sit well with me. I am sitting here feeling like crap and a little stuck.
Gross... this is miserable.
My weight has been at a stand still but I haven't been doing my part to drop the weight. I keep getting up every morning deciding I will do it today and then by the evening I over did it enough just to maintain. Today I am hanging tough and if I can get through today it should get easier tomorrow and the next day and the next. I just wish I would stay full longer so I could stop thinking about food for a while.
Even though I am not losing weight right now my co-workers keep telling me I look thinner. That is always a bonus and I will take it!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Oww... did I mention I need a little motivation?! I haven't been making the best choices. I think this whole 10 lb doctor challenge is stressing me out.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
And when will I know I am at my sweet spot? I am sort of struggling here because I am so hungry and I start to eat and I get stuck, so I slow down chew good and get in a couple more bites and then stuck again. Help! Do you guys having any suggestions? Honestly, I am tempted to go for the ice cream!
*Thank the person who nominated you for this award
*Copy the award and post it to your blog
*Link to the blog of the person who nominated you
*Tell 7 interesting things about yourself
*Nominate 7 bloggers
*Post links to the blogs of your nominees
So, here are the 7 things that are maybe (or maybe not) interesting about me:
1. I was my high schools mascot, a cougar.
2. I hate when fruit gets poked or skewered. It creeps me out.
3. I grew up in the great white Upper Peninsula of Michigan. There were lots of bears.
4. My husband and I met on the Internet.
5. I had surgery in March of 2008 for a pilonidal cyst on my tail bone area. The cyst was so big that the surgeon had to make an incision that was 4 inches deep by 6 inches wide. It couldn't be closed and my husband had to pack the wound 3 x a day for almost a year. I documented the entire thing in photos. I still had an open wound when I had my LB surgery.
6. I asked Conan O'Brien to prom.
7. I worked in a tattoo parlor in high school drawing flash art (the drawings they have on the walls as tattoo examples).
The final part of this nomination was to nominate 7 others. Like Amy, I don't think I can nominate just 7. You are all beautiful bloggers to me and such an inspiration. If my nomination must be revoked for this reason, I understand! :)
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Our pets are like our children. We love them so much and couldn't imagine losing them. I know the time will come, but little Sophia is very young and active. The thought of her being sick was shocking and devastating. So... this all lead to some really bad eating. My weight was not my priority and I just didn't care.
I went in for a fill today and I was up a couple pounds. I always weigh a little heavier on his scale so I am not sure how real that gain is. I will weigh myself tomorrow morning and update my ticker accordingly.
I was so happy to see Dr. Katz. He is wonderful and always tells me how amazing I am doing on my weight loss. He asked me how much I can eat... which honestly, I don't really get full, so I told him. He said I need another cc. So, he gave me 1 cc, had me drink some water and all was well. He did tell me he would like to see me down another 10 by my next appointment 4 weeks from today. He knows my motivation has been waining and thought a challenge might help. I think I can do it.. especially if this fill gets me to where I think it will.
The funny thing is... I don't really know how much I have in my band. I was filled during a revision surgery and Dr. Katz doesn't remember how much he put in. He doesn't feel that the number is that important and he doesn't draw my fill out before adding more. He had given me a guess last time I saw him but I don't remember. I do believe I am over half full with my 10 cc band. I think he thought I was over five last time so I am thinking I am 6-6.5 cc. After my fill last month I was no longer able to eat rice or bread and had to chew much more carefully. I was starting to feel like I couldn't push the volume of food quite as much.
Anyway, today turned out to be a really good day. I feel good, and am ready to get a jump on the weight loss again. How are all you guys doing?
Saturday, February 13, 2010
On to my NSV... Jason (my husband) coaches Freshman basketball so I love going to the games. Well last night his team played a team that a friend of ours coaches. So I am sitting in the bleacher and the friend walks by so I yell to him. He looks at me and I see him finally make the connection of who I am (I haven't seen him since pre-op). I talked to him for a few minutes. Later my husband comes over to talk to me and tells me that the friend said, "Jay, Anna is looking gooood." I believe there was even a wink. Now, I will say, I was wearing a good outfit, my hair was good, and I had on make-up. But, I am also 60 lbs lighter. It felt great.
Hope you all have a great weekend!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
I will do something with the hub after I get out of work on Sunday for the big V Day. We generally don't make a big deal out of it but like to have a special meal and exchange cards. It is always kind of fun. I would guess it will be kind of quiet at the library, but I could be wrong.
A week from tomorrow I get my next fill and I can't wait! I am feeling some restriction, as I have mentioned before, but it seems to disappearing again. I also don't stay full for very long. It is only a couple hours after I eat that I start to get hungry again. I do think this next fill is going to start to make a big difference.
Happy Monday all!
Saturday, February 6, 2010
If you squint and look really close you will see 199.6!
Friday, February 5, 2010
No super exciting plans for the weekend. My nephew and brother-in-law are in town for a hockey tournament my nephew is playing in this weekend. We will go to at least one of the games and probably hang out with them at their hotel a bit. Tonight is a semi late night for my husband so I will be doing dinner alone. I am planning on having a taco salad.
Oww... I ordered a big box of VitaBrownies this week and they came yesterday. Yum-O! They are 100 cal, 2.5 gram fat, 6 gram fiber, and 4 grams of protein and taste DELICIOUS! They are pricey though. But when I need a chocolate fix, these do just the trick!
Thursday, February 4, 2010
The scale has been very stagnant this week. Even though I have an official weigh-in day (which I may discontinue and just change my ticker whenever I hit a new low) I often check my weight through-out the week. Not daily, but probably every other or so. Well, I have dropped a very small amount of weight this week... I will update you tomorrow. Maybe the scale gods will bless me over night.
So, last night my husband and I went out to eat. I am for sure starting to feel restriction and have to be careful of my choices and to chew well. I asked Jason if I never lost another pound and maintained at this weight if he thought my surgery was a success. He said yes. I have been thinking about this a lot. I am so near to 60 lbs down and really feel like a different person. I feel great in fact. I am still obese, I still have much more to lose, but I am feeling somewhat attractive and pretty healthy. My weight loss has slowed, but honestly, that has been my own fault. I haven't made great choices all the time, not even 90% of the time. I have probably made good choices 75% of the time. If I was maintaining that would be great, but no so much for losing.
Now that restriction is kicking in, I feel like good choices are so much easier to make and that my portions really are starting to be controlled. I guess my question for those of you who are experienced with restriction is: How do you know when you have eaten enough? I still don't feel like I have "soft stop" or a full signal. I know I will not feel FULL. But I need help knowing what to look for, or will I just know when I have good restriction?
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
I can't seem to stay away from this freak'n bowl. I wish all the office candy would just go away. But no such luck, the bowls just keep getting refilled with new and exciting things. Today I had an almond Hershey's kiss, a chocolate mint square, and a tiny pack of gummy lifesavers. Thank God I did an hour of step aerobics this morning or I would really be hating myself. I guess eating 3 pieces is better then the whole bowl right?!
On another note, I don't see that magical 199 in this weeks forecast. It seems the scale is slow to move this week. I am okay with this. It is coming.
Monday, February 1, 2010
4.5 hours of walking to burn off 3 margaritas!!! It seems so unfair to me that it takes so much more work to take this weight off as it so easily comes on. Guess I will have to stick with the treadmill!